Why Florida is an awsome place to live

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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Postby xouper » Fri Jul 21, 2017 9:30 am


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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Postby ed » Fri Jul 21, 2017 11:23 am

He didn’t like the AT&T trucks parked in front of his home. So he shot them.
BY CARLI TEPROFF
cteproff@miamiherald.com

UPDATE: The man who shot at parked AT&T trucks told police he went ‘bananas’

n.b. That is a legal defense in Florida

Jorge Jove didn't like the AT&T work trucks in front of his Hialeah home Wednesday morning. So, he retrieved his revolver and began shooting out the tires and the engine, police said.

I don't see a problem yet.

Though Jove began firing to kill only a vehicle, a Hialeah sergeant says he saw Jove fire at an AT&T worker in a raised bucket lift.

Heresay and fruit from the forbidden tree. Did that Sargent have a warrent? No. He was guilty of Tresspass and was clearly muddying the water.

Hialeah police arrested on a charge of aggravated assault with a firearm and criminal mischief.

hmmm ... "Criminal" mischief might be a problem. Ordinary mischief if no prob at all.
He posted $30,000 bond. Police seized the handgun from Jove, who doesn’t have a concealed weapons permit, according to the arrest affidavit.

There you go, that's his problem.

Cell phone video rolled as Jove, 64, calmly walked around the first truck and shot at all four tires. The sound of the air coming out of the tires followed the blast.

So?

Jove then walked to the second bucket truck and began shooting at the front of it, reloading the gun several times.

Which is why I tell people "revolvers are no good for utilities, get a 16 shot semi auto"

Meanwhile, one of the AT&T workers could be heard calling police to report the shooting.

Thats called being an "officious intermeddler" and is a felony in Florida.

“He's shooting the truck right now,” said a man who identified himself as Derrick Taylor, a technician with AT&T. “There's a guy shooting the tires and shooting the engines and everything.”

We all blog down here

As Taylor spoke to the dispatcher, Jove continued his attack on the trucks.

He's like the guy reporting on the Hindenburg. This is media gold
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Postby ed » Fri Jul 21, 2017 11:30 am

Some true, authentic awesomeness:


Frozen pork fell from the sky, and it came from Myakka City
BY TERRY SPENCER
Associated Press

FORT LAUDERDALE
Meat falling from the sky is weird, even by Florida standards.

But that’s what happened at 4 a.m. Saturday when a 15-pound bag of frozen pork landed on the Deerfield Beach home of Travis Adair and his family.

Adair said Thursday that the package hit his roof with a “big bang.” He thought it was thunder, but his wife Jennie later went outside and found two bundles next to the house. His son Austin found three on the roof.

“It had to fall from the sky,” Adair said. “It was too heavy to throw on the roof.” The home is near three airports, so Adair thinks it fell from a plane.

The Federal Aviation Administration had no immediate comment Thursday

Labeling on the package shows it originally belonged to Jim Williams, who lives 170 miles away in Manatee County’s Myakka City. Williams, who owns a company that prepares fields for planting, said Thursday he bought some pigs from some children at a county fair in January <and killed them>. He kept much of the meat and gave some away but he has no idea how any of it ended up on the Adairs’ roof. He is not a pilot and doesn’t own a plane.

“I would have thought 15 pounds of frozen meat falling from an airplane would have put a hole in the roof,” Williams said.

His friend, Jimmy Fussell, who owns the butcher shop that processed the pigs for Williams, said the mystery, which was featured on “Jimmy Kimmel Live,” certainly “beats hearing about all the politics going on.” And it has given everyone in Myakka City a laugh.

As for the meat, the Adairs threw it away – though Williams has offered to throw the family a barbecue.

http://www.bradenton.com/news/weird/art ... 23888.html

n.b. There is an exclusion to copyright law that states (I summarize) that if you are the subject of the thing in question you can steal it.
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Postby Pyrrho » Sat Jul 22, 2017 5:45 pm

You sure it's pork and not something Dexter was getting rid of?

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The flash of light you saw in the sky was not a UFO. Swamp gas from a weather balloon was trapped in a thermal pocket and reflected the light from Venus.

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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Postby Witness » Sat Jul 22, 2017 10:39 pm

Turtle Crashes Through Woman's Windshield on Florida Interstate

One woman got the shock of a lifetime after a turtle crashed through her windshield on a Florida highway.

The turtle was propelled through the air on I-4 in Deltona and crashed into Nicole Bjanes’ windshield as she was driving at about 75 miles an hour on Monday afternoon. Miraculously, the turtle and the driver both walked -- and, in one case, swam -- away mostly unscathed.

Florida Highway Patrol officers responding to the scene explained, “A vehicle in front [of Bjanes’ car] ran over the turtle. The turtle was thrown airborne and struck the windshield ... shattering it.”

Bjanes said she saw the debris in the road, but did not realize it was actually a turtle. The reptile came flying through her windshield, bounced off the passenger seat, and then landed on her dashboard. She was treated at the scene for minor cuts by EMS.

In a Facebook post, a shell-shocked Bjanes wrote that despite wanting to keep her new, albeit unexpected, friend, “The turtle was okay and we put it back in the water.”

http://abcnews.go.com/Weird/turtle-crashes-womans-windshield-florida-interstate/story?id=39097342

Even the turtles are tough in Florida. :shock:

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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Postby ed » Sun Jul 23, 2017 12:24 am

Witness wrote:
Turtle Crashes Through Woman's Windshield on Florida Interstate

One woman got the shock of a lifetime after a turtle crashed through her windshield on a Florida highway.

The turtle was propelled through the air on I-4 in Deltona and crashed into Nicole Bjanes’ windshield as she was driving at about 75 miles an hour on Monday afternoon. Miraculously, the turtle and the driver both walked -- and, in one case, swam -- away mostly unscathed.

Florida Highway Patrol officers responding to the scene explained, “A vehicle in front [of Bjanes’ car] ran over the turtle. The turtle was thrown airborne and struck the windshield ... shattering it.”

Bjanes said she saw the debris in the road, but did not realize it was actually a turtle. The reptile came flying through her windshield, bounced off the passenger seat, and then landed on her dashboard. She was treated at the scene for minor cuts by EMS.

In a Facebook post, a shell-shockedBjanes wrote that despite wanting to keep her new, albeit unexpected, friend, “The turtle was okay and we put it back in the water.”

http://abcnews.go.com/Weird/turtle-crashes-womans-windshield-florida-interstate/story?id=39097342

Even the turtles are tough in Florida. :shock:


See what they did there? We are known for whatever that is.
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Postby Witness » Mon Jul 24, 2017 11:52 pm

The Florida Senate wrote:CS/CS/HB 989: Instructional Materials

[…]
Instructional Materials; Revises district school board responsibilities relating to review & adoption of public K-12 instructional materials; authorizes county residents to challenge use or adoption of instructional materials; revises requirements relating to public hearing for adoption of such materials; revises annual allocation for purchase of instructional materials.
https://www.flsenate.gov/Session/Bill/2017/00989 (with link to the bill)

If I understand it correctly, any citizen (not just a parent) can now object to what is taught and which documents are used. (At the school libraries too, I presume?)

Here's the opinion of a teacher (some commie atheist, no doubt):
http://www.palmbeachpost.com/news/opinion/point-view-new-curriculum-challenge-law-hides-non-science-agenda/QA4Zc6bnPkjDTi7jBVITLL/

And here from a parent's association which starts most of its FB posts with a Bible verse:

Image

Pornography, indeed! :mrgreen:

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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Postby Rob Lister » Tue Jul 25, 2017 9:53 am

There's a typo. 'hearing officer that is unbias' Lacks good comma too.

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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Postby ed » Tue Jul 25, 2017 10:10 am

She was clearly typing whilst being pursued by a gator. Some sensitivity is called for, I think.
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Postby Rob Lister » Tue Jul 25, 2017 11:07 am

No closing quote after pornographic either.

Last three words. Needs the determiner the.

Does the Washington Post have editors?

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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Postby Abdul Alhazred » Tue Jul 25, 2017 12:32 pm

Rob Lister wrote:Does the Washington Post have editors?


Fired them all (along with the stenographers and typists).

Technology marches on. :)
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Postby Witness » Tue Aug 29, 2017 3:11 am

The Sun Sentinel wrote:Goat blood-drinking Charlottesville speaker from Orlando announces GOP run for Senate

Augustus Invictus, the former Orlando attorney listed as a speaker at the Aug. 12 white nationalist rally in Charlottesville, Va., has announced he is running again for U.S. Senate in Florida, this time as a Republican.

In a YouTube video shot outside Democratic U.S. Sen. Bill Nelson’s office in Orlando, the former Libertarian revealed he’s running for Nelson’s seat on the GOP ticket in 2018.

He also blamed “leftists” for the violent events in Charlottesville three days earlier, in which a counterprotester was killed and others injured after a car ran into them. An Ohio man has been charged with second-degree murder.

In his video, Invictus claimed “the left has been physically attacking patriotic groups, free speech rallies and protests of the destruction of our heritage in the South. [It’s] a campaign of terror from coast to coast.”

Invictus, 34, had previously run for a Florida U.S. Senate seat in 2016 as a Libertarian before losing in the party’s primary.
[…]
Invictus’ runs in 2016, which included his admission he killed a goat and drank its blood in a pagan ritual three years earlier, led to Libertarian state Chairman Adrian Wyllie resigning in protest and the disbanding of the Libertarian Party of Seminole County.

Wyllie alleged at the time Invictus wanted to recruit neo-Nazis to the party and supported a eugenics program, which Invictus denied.

http://www.sun-sentinel.com/news/politics/os-invictus-senate-candidacy-20170821-story.html#nt=oft01a-6li2

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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Postby ed » Sun Sep 10, 2017 11:05 am

Just to lighten things up a bit ..
Gator found holding body in its mouth in Lakeland

http://www.wesh.com/article/gator-found ... nd/4450000

I want to point out another thing that makes us a great place:

Nuisance Alligator Hotline: 866-FWC-GATOR


Your state (country) have one? I think not.
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Postby Anaxagoras » Thu Sep 28, 2017 1:52 am

Cops: Son-in-Law Reveals Their Affair, Mom Goes After Him

Kathleen Davis, 58, says his confession ruined her relationship with daughter


(Newser) – A Florida mom allegedly tried to run down her daughter's husband with her Mercedes after he exposed their affair. The Palm Beach Post reports that Kathleen Regina Davis, 58, told cops she wanted her son-in-law dead after he wrecked her relationship with her daughter by copping to the affair. Palm Beach Gardens police found Davis driving in circles around Michael Sciarra's front yard just before 9pm last Wednesday, allegedly trying to hit him, reports WPBF. She nearly succeeded, the 33-year-old told cops.

The assault allegedly began with Davis tossing eggs at his house and cars. CBS12 quotes Sciarra as saying he went outside to investigate the "banging" he heard and saw Davis hurling the eggs. He says he warned her he was going to call 911 and says that's when she got behind the wheel and came after him.


The motherfucker had it coming. 8)
A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool.
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Postby WildCat » Thu Sep 28, 2017 3:10 am

Meanwhile, Florida Man uses himself as bait to catch a shark:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hMg3_QMCcAs
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Postby Fid » Thu Sep 28, 2017 3:38 am

Note to shark,a few inches down and you'd have had your snack and been on your way.
Geez, kiddo sharks these days. :roll:
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Postby Witness » Mon Oct 02, 2017 2:58 am


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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Postby sparks » Mon Oct 02, 2017 6:08 am

WildCat wrote:Meanwhile, Florida Man uses himself as bait to catch a shark:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hMg3_QMCcAs


One more once with feeling:

"You know the thing about a shark is those black eyes, like a dolls eyes, doesn't seem to be livin', until he bites ya. I'll never put on a lifejacket again chief."
You can lead them to knowledge, but you can't make them think.

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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Postby Witness » Tue Oct 17, 2017 4:48 am

WaPo wrote:She claimed tall, blond aliens kidnapped her as a child. Now she’s running for Congress.

In one video that was uploaded to YouTube long before it was highlighted by the Herald, Rodriguez Aguilera, a Republican, said she saw the round spaceship for the first time when she was 7, after her parents asked her to go outside their home.

She boarded the spaceship, she said, and saw round seats.

After the vessel took off, she said, aliens explained to her what they planned to do.

“God is a universal energy, not a person,” the aliens told her, according to Rodriguez Aguilera. “It’s in everything. God talks to people and they understand it in different ways, but there’s only one religion.”

In another interview, she said the beings, with their arms wide open, reminded her of Jesus Christ, and that she saw them again during her teenage years.

She also claimed that the center of energy is in Africa; that 30,000 skulls different from human skulls are in a subterranean cave on the island of Malta in the Mediterranean; and that Coral Castle, a limestone structure in South Florida, is an ancient pyramid.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/powerpost/wp/2017/10/16/she-claimed-tall-blond-aliens-kidnapped-her-as-a-child-now-shes-running-for-congress/?tid=hybrid_experimentrandom_with_top_mostshared_2_na&utm_term=.c3035d2d7df5

:mrgreen:

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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Postby sparks » Tue Oct 17, 2017 1:10 pm

Wow.

Time to bring Shirley MacLaine out of retirement.
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