Colonoscopy

Ever had it before? Well you got it again.
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Pyrrho
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Colonoscopy

Postby Pyrrho » Fri Sep 12, 2014 6:47 pm

Doctor recommends one. His nurses enthusiastically agree.

I'm not too thrilled about the idea of having my interior probed.
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Re: Colonoscopy

Postby asthmatic camel » Fri Sep 12, 2014 7:01 pm

It's not that bad.

Apart from the laxatives you have to take beforehand...

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Re: Colonoscopy

Postby Rob Lister » Fri Sep 12, 2014 7:01 pm

don't do it. you gotta put your foot down. which is worse? colon cancer or getting a red hot poker iron shoved up your asshole? I hear that if it hits a gas pocket, you'll explode. They'll take pictures and post them to their iCloud. You know what happens then. The nurses will make fun of your ugly anus while your half-way out.

"Does he even use toilet paper?" they'll ask. "LOL, no I don't think so," the doctor will reply.

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Re: Colonoscopy

Postby corplinx » Fri Sep 12, 2014 7:35 pm

Had one. Back then you just took handfuls of pills every 10 minutes for an hour with water, to purge. They stopped doing that I heard. After an hour, you blow out pretty thoroughly and drink nothing but clear fluids til the procedure.

After the procedure, you will awaken and cut earth shattering farts. They fill your colon with air, and it all has to come back out.

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Re: Colonoscopy

Postby MrMonty » Fri Sep 12, 2014 7:45 pm

I've had 3 because I have ulcerative colitis. The "prep" was way worse for me than the procedure. No eating except jello, popsicles, and broth, all the while clearing out your bowels with some nasty stuff that made me want to vomit.
During the procedure they use "twilight" drugs so you're somewhat awake but the drugs will also make you not remember too much. It was a creepy feeling the times they had to take a biopsy.

A trip to the dentist is usually a much worse event than my colonoscopies were.

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Re: Colonoscopy

Postby sparks » Fri Sep 12, 2014 11:17 pm

Over 50? The you need the yearly probing. And throw in the blood test for prostate cancer too.
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Re: Colonoscopy

Postby Doctor X » Sat Sep 13, 2014 12:03 am

Make sure he double gloves his fist.







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If all goes well, post the video on Youtube.

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Re: Colonoscopy

Postby Witness » Sat Sep 13, 2014 2:23 am

To be on the safe side, do it monthly. :twisted:

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Re: Colonoscopy

Postby sparks » Sat Sep 13, 2014 6:10 am

Unnecessary. Those things don't change that often.
Nice things? Hell no!

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Re: Colonoscopy

Postby Witness » Sat Sep 13, 2014 3:00 pm

sparks wrote:Unnecessary. Those things don't change that often.

Make it weekly, what would we be without our Master of Ceremonies? :shock:

But please read the fine print, Pyrrho:

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Re: Colonoscopy

Postby pillory » Sat Sep 13, 2014 10:02 pm

swallow the camera man---
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Re: Colonoscopy

Postby grayman » Sun Sep 14, 2014 12:05 am

If you feel him put his hand on your shoulder during the procedure, and then you feel his other hand on your other shoulder...





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