Vollebak Baker Miller Relaxation Hoodie
uncrate.com (online store)
It's no secret that certain colors can cause your body to do certain things. The Vollebak Baker Miller Relaxation Hoodie takes this knowledge and uses it to hack your own body. The interior of its fully enclosed hood is done in a color called Baker Miller Pink, which has been proven to activate your parasympathetic nervous system and calm you down. It also has a mesh visor to let you see out but stops others from seeing in, vents that encourage breathing through your nose, and asymmetrical pockets designed like slings that further help you relax. It even comes with its own soundtrack of pink noise, and has a zippered inside pocket for your phone with built-in cable channels. None of that matters if you're not comfortable, of course, so it's crafted from a warm material that's also water resistant and provides extra cushioning when you lie down.
All the comfort of a straight jacket, all the privacy of a burkha, and still stay connected.
Now all you need is an interior decorator to make the walls of your playroom tasteful yet soft and cuddly.