Jim Bakker's survival food sucks

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Jim Bakker's survival food sucks

Postby Pyrrho » Fri Dec 04, 2015 11:32 am

So say the mavens at NPR:

http://www.npr.org/sections/thesalt/201 ... vival-food

Jim Bakker is back, with a television ministry in Missouri and a wife named Lori. He's also selling food. Among the freeze-dried products available on his website is a 50-day "Survival Food" sampler bucket containing 154 meals. It will cost you $135, but the idea is that you'll be prepared when food shortages hit.

"Imagine — the world is dying and you're having a breakfast for kings," the ad for the the food proclaims.

We got our hands on a version of this bucket, which contains a variety of hearty dishes, including buttermilk pancakes, vegetable chicken soup, creamy stroganoff, black bean burgers, fettucine alfredo and mashed potatoes.

If you're an outdoor aficionado, you're probably familiar with freeze-dried food. That's what this stuff is, except all the packages have an expiration date of 2035. In addition to ample preservatives, each item is either nitrogen flushed or contains oxygen absorbers, reputedly to keep the food fresh.

Rest assured that Jim Bakker is still the hateable kook we all know and despise:

http://www.patheos.com/blogs/friendlyat ... ainst-him/

According to Bakker, ["a very well-known man of God"] sat next to a self-proclaimed witch on an airplane who told him that her coven was going to “take down” Jim Bakker.

“She said, ‘Right now, all the witches … They’re all agreeing they’re going to destroy the television ministries and we’re starting with Jim Bakker. And we are all praying, praying to destroy him,’” Bakker said.
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Re: Jim Bakker's survival food sucks

Postby Abdul Alhazred » Fri Dec 04, 2015 2:10 pm

So when God rains down fire on the Last Day, you can get through it with freeze dried food?
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Re: Jim Bakker's survival food sucks

Postby sparks » Fri Dec 04, 2015 5:06 pm

Typical huckster shit. "End Times Quick And Easy Banquet Meals" right next to the Tammy Faye makeup kit. Goddamned fucking cunts, one and all.
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Re: Jim Bakker's survival food sucks

Postby Doctor X » Fri Dec 04, 2015 8:28 pm

One of the Japanese Original Cunts.

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