Was Attila the Hun a gay midget?

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Was Attila the Hun a gay midget?

Post by shemp » Wed Oct 17, 2018 3:16 am

I offer two pieces of evidence:

1. The fifth century C.E. Greek historian Priscus of Panium described him as:
Short of stature, with a broad chest and a large head
These are attributes of dwarfism. Clearly, Attila was a midget.

2. This is a likeness by artist and historian George S. Stuart created from his physical description mentioned in historical records:

Image

There he is, all dolled up on his cute little pony with it's own cute necktie. That is so fucking gay!

So, we have no choice but to conclude that Attila the Hun was a gay midget. Feel free to applaud me for my extensive research.
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Re: Was Attila the Hun a gay midget?

Post by Doctor X » Wed Oct 17, 2018 5:53 am

We call them "Little Faggots" you prejudiced scum!

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Re: Was Attila the Hun a gay midget?

Post by Abdul Alhazred » Wed Oct 17, 2018 8:38 am

NOT GAY!!!1!!!!!

You straight guys are just going to have to own Attila. :)
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Re: Was Attila the Hun a gay midget?

Post by Giz » Wed Oct 17, 2018 9:40 pm

First Alexander, then Julius Caesar and now Attila?!

Next you'll tell us that Nelson was kissing fellas!

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Re: Was Attila the Hun a gay midget?

Post by Doctor X » Wed Oct 17, 2018 10:02 pm

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Re: Was Attila the Hun a gay midget?

Post by The Editor » Wed Oct 17, 2018 10:04 pm

“I never said it. I wish I had.”

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Re: Was Attila the Hun a gay midget?

Post by Abdul Alhazred » Wed Oct 17, 2018 10:19 pm

Giz wrote:
Wed Oct 17, 2018 9:40 pm
First Alexander, then Julius Caesar and now Attila?!

Next you'll tell us that Nelson was kissing fellas!
Alexander -- gay

Julius -- switch hitter 8)

Nelson -- Royal Navy (need I say more) :coolspecs:

Attila -- Obviously straight all the way. Obviously. :evil:
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Re: Was Attila the Hun a gay midget?

Post by shemp » Thu Oct 18, 2018 1:47 am

Abdul Alhazred wrote:
Wed Oct 17, 2018 10:19 pm
Giz wrote:
Wed Oct 17, 2018 9:40 pm
First Alexander, then Julius Caesar and now Attila?!

Next you'll tell us that Nelson was kissing fellas!
Alexander -- gay

Julius -- switch hitter 8)

Nelson -- Royal Navy (need I say more) :coolspecs:

Attila -- Obviously straight all the way. Obviously. :evil:
Hey pal, who's the historical research expert here? Attila was as gay as the Ace of Spades!
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Re: Was Attila the Hun a gay midget?

Post by Giz » Thu Oct 18, 2018 2:10 am

Atilla called the men he rode with “hun”. That does sound kinda gay.

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Re: Was Attila the Hun a gay midget?

Post by Doctor X » Thu Oct 18, 2018 2:54 am

"The Hun?"

We all know what a bunch of limp-wristed walking perfume shops the Germans are.

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Re: Was Attila the Hun a gay midget?

Post by Abdul Alhazred » Thu Oct 18, 2018 12:06 pm

The Ace of Spades was gay? That's not what your mom told me. :o
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Re: Was Attila the Hun a gay midget?

Post by ed » Thu Oct 18, 2018 12:17 pm

The Editor wrote:
Wed Oct 17, 2018 10:04 pm
“I never said it. I wish I had.”

--Winston Churchill, responding to his personal assistant Anthony Montague-Browne's inquiry as to whether or not he actually made that statement.
“Just kidding”

--Winston Churchill, following up on his response to his personal assistant Anthony Montague-Browne's inquiry as to whether or not he actually made that statement.
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Re: Was Attila the Hun a gay midget?

Post by Abdul Alhazred » Thu Oct 18, 2018 12:30 pm

Misattributed to Churchill when he was First Lord of the Admiralty.

Actually said by Somerset Gough-Calthorpe who was Second Lord of the Admiralty.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Somerset_Gough-Calthorpe
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Re: Was Attila the Hun a gay midget?

Post by Giz » Thu Oct 18, 2018 12:33 pm

Abdul Alhazred wrote:
Thu Oct 18, 2018 12:30 pm
Misattributed to Churchill when he was First Lord of the Admiralty.

Actually said by Somerset Gough-Calthorpe who was Second Lord of the Admiralty.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Somerset_Gough-Calthorpe
Oh, the vice-lord?

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Re: Was Attila the Hun a gay midget?

Post by ed » Thu Oct 18, 2018 12:35 pm

Abdul Alhazred wrote:
Thu Oct 18, 2018 12:30 pm
Misattributed to Churchill when he was First Lord of the Admiralty.

Actually said by Somerset Gough-Calthorpe who was Second Lord of the Admiralty.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Somerset_Gough-Calthorpe

Your reference does not support your contention.

Furthermore:
Promoted to rear admiral
Figures.
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Re: Was Attila the Hun a gay midget?

Post by ed » Thu Oct 18, 2018 12:48 pm

shemp wrote:
Wed Oct 17, 2018 3:16 am

These are attributes of dwarfism. Clearly, Attila was a midget.

ummm
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Re: Was Attila the Hun a gay midget?

Post by Abdul Alhazred » Thu Oct 18, 2018 12:57 pm

Oh yeah.

Isn't "m*dg*t" a bad word? Unlike "dwarf" which is cool?

Or is that backwards?
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Re: Was Attila the Hun a gay midget?

Post by Giz » Thu Oct 18, 2018 1:00 pm

He wasn’t able to besiege Rome because he only had ... small arms.

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Re: Was Attila the Hun a gay midget?

Post by gnome » Thu Oct 18, 2018 4:45 pm

Seems as good a breakdown as any:

https://www.diffen.com/difference/Dwarf_vs_Midget
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Re: Was Attila the Hun a gay midget?

Post by Giz » Thu Oct 18, 2018 5:44 pm

It's kinda strange to me that it is midget that it's considered offensive rather than dwarf. I mean midget had always been a term for "short human" whereas dwarf is for an inhuman elf/goblin/pixie whatever. Seems like "dwarf" is the de-humanizing word.