Mitt Romney vs. Evander Holyfield

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Mitt Romney vs. Evander Holyfield

Postby Anaxagoras » Tue Mar 17, 2015 2:51 am

Doesn't seem like a very fair fight but I guess that isn't the point: ... paring-for

I've learned the real reason why Mitt Romney chose not to run for president for a third time in 2016.

He's taking up boxing.

In fact, Romney is slated to fight former heavyweight boxing champion Evander Holyfield in the marquee event during a several-bout evening at the Rail Event Center near the Union Pacific Depot in Salt Lake City on May 15.

"It will either be a very short fight, or I will be knocked unconscious," Romney quipped in an interview recently. "It won't be much of a fight. We'll both suit up and get in the ring and spar around a little bit."

Alas, it will be a one-fight career for the 68-year-old former Massachusetts governor and Salt Lake City Winter Olympics boss.

Besides the fact that Holyfield is a former champion, he's 16 years younger than Romney. It's for charity.
A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool.
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Re: Mitt Romney vs. Evander Holyfield

Postby gnome » Tue Mar 17, 2015 3:06 pm

What should be his boxer nickname?
"If fighting is sure to result in victory, then you must fight! Sun Tzu said that, and I'd say he knows a little bit more about fighting than you do, pal, because he invented it, and then he perfected it so that no living man could best him in the ring of honor. Then, he used his fight money to buy two of every animal on earth, and then he herded them onto a boat, and then he beat the crap out of every single one. And from that day forward any time a bunch of animals are together in one place it's called a zoo! (Beat) Unless it's a farm!"
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Re: Mitt Romney vs. Evander Holyfield

Postby ed » Tue Mar 17, 2015 3:06 pm

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Re: Mitt Romney vs. Evander Holyfield

Postby Evolver » Thu Mar 19, 2015 11:22 am

- It's for a good cause: getting the shit beat out of Mitt. I'd donate $1000 to ensure that Holyfield doesn't pull any punches.

- Speaking of punches, what's the line on whether or not Mitt punches like a girl?

- Or hires on of his undocumented gardeners to fight for him?

- Very quickly, Mitt will find himself in his natural position: lying.

- Evander had better protect his ears.
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Re: Mitt Romney vs. Evander Holyfield

Postby Abdul Alhazred » Thu Mar 19, 2015 1:26 pm

What's Evander's position on immigration? :BigGrin3:
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