Sorry to Make You Cry XIV

Never agree to 3 points on top of the vig.
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Doctor X
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Sorry to Make You Cry XIV

Post by Doctor X » Tue Sep 04, 2018 6:11 am

After MORE than a decade . . . of dominance and nearly two decades of Dynasty!!

Image

From The Office of the Two Time Grand Champion

"The merciful and compassionate!"

And this is how I began last year quoting how we began the previous year . . . quoting how we began the previous year . . . quoting how we began the previous year quoting how we began the previous year . . . quoting the previous year . . . quoting the previous year . . . quoting the previous year . . . quoting the previous year . . . quoting the previous year . . . quoting the previous year:
There is that scent in the air . . . the scent of Dolphin failure! The scent of Chicago not having a quarterback! The scent of San Diego Los Angeles fans still not over last year!
Has anything really changed?

There is a scent in the air. . . .
Ramathorn: What's that smell Rabbit?

Image

Rabbit: FEAR!
AND WHAT A SEASON IT IS SHAPING UP TO BECOME! {You're Mom goes to college!} [Shhh!--Ed.]

The rules, as Carr explained, remain:

T3h Rulz:

Rule the First: "Same idea as last year. Pick a team each week, if that team loses you then own that team and get one point for each regular season win that team gets."

ALL games count: Thursday, Sunday, Day-Night Double-Header to make up for a rain out. . . . I follow the NFL Schedule. So start picking NOW!

Rule the Second: You can pick and change up to the time of kickoff.

Rule the Third: "Mulligan!!"
  • 1. Regular Season: each player has one "Mulligan." Those with one will have an "*" next to their name in the Grid of Despair. That means you get one chance to pick a second game if your first game FAILS.

    You declare it . . . you used it whatever the outcome of the first game is.

    2. Playoffs? Image

    3. What if Gonna be Absent? For those who are "away" one may post or PM. The second pick must be before the kick-off of that game. So, yes, you can fail on Sunday and pick a later game, even Monday Night Football.

    You can post "Imma picking Denver to lose but if that FAIL, I am picking the Jags to lose!"

    You have used your "Mulligan."
Bonus Points: :hyper:

Win a Division: 4 points
Wild Card: 2 points
Win in First Round of playoffs : 3 point
Win in Divisional Round: 5 points
Win Conference Championship: 7 points
Win Superbowl: 15 points

Supersorrytomakeyoucrybubblebonus: The team that finishes one place out of a playoff spot pays a 2.5 point bonus.
This will be based on the semi-official NFL standings.

ExtraEvidencesDr.XMeaniebonus: Beating the Patriots pays 1 point.

DoNotJudgeOthersbyYourStandardsCHARLEY_BIGTIMEbonus: Beating Pittsburgh pays 1 point.

Doctor X is a MEANIE Point: Your Humble and Magnificent Messiah [PBUH--Ed.] gets 1 points if you pick the Patriots to lose and they win.

Dipshit Bonus: Image 6 point bonus if you own all teams playing in a playoff round (and thus cannot pick a team)--unLESS:

RadrickGamblingBonus: Image if eligible for the Dipshit Bonus, you can still choose to pick a loser. If the team loses, you get 10 points. If they win, you get . . . nothing! And you will like it!

In the Rain Bonus: If you have a team that fires a coach before and including Week 9, you get 10 points. If you have a team whose coach is fired before Brack Fliday [Monday--Ed.], you get 5 points. After Brack Fliday [Monday--Ed.] you get 2 points:
  • 1. Rained on by Week 9: 10 points.
    2. Rained on before Brack Fliday [Monday--Ed.]: 5 points
    3. Rained on on or after Brack Fliday [Monday--Ed.]: 2 points
shempICan'tWinforLosingBonus: If you pick a team up to and including Week 12 OR prior to the first team to clinch a playoff spot AND your team is losing by 14 or more points in the 4th quarter yet they win? You get 1 point consolation. And you will like it.

Super Bowl is the cut-off.

Image

Playoffs: "Playoffs? Playoffs?!"

If you pick a team to lose IN the playoffs, you get only the season wins and any previous post season wins. No play-off bonuses.

I am ethically and spiritually barred from choosing NE since I would be guaranteeing myself my own "MEANIE point." If the situation arises in the "Playoffs?" where there is no team I can pick, I default to either the Dipshit Bonus or the RadrickGamblingBonus.

SUGGESTIONS will be entertained.



--J. "Bow to Your Sensei. BOW TO YOUR SENSEI!" [Shhh!--Ed.] D.

P.S. Image
Mob of the Mean: Free beanie, cattle-prod and Charley Fan Club!
"Doctor X is just treating you the way he treats everyone--as subhuman crap too dumb to breathe in after you breathe out."--Don
DocX: FTW.--sparks
"Doctor X wins again."--Pyrrho
"Never sorry to make a racist Fucktard cry."--His Humble MagNIfIcence
"It was the criticisms of Doc X, actually, that let me see more clearly how far the hypocrisy had gone."--clarsct
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"Indeed you are a river to your people.
Shit. That's going to end up in your sig."--Pyrrho
"Try a twelve step program and accept Doctor X as your High Power."--asthmatic camel
"just like Doc X said." --gnome

WS CHAMPIONS X3!!! NBA CHAMPIONS!! Stanley Cup! SB CHAMPIONS X5!!!!!
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Re: Sorry to Make You Cry XIV

Post by Captain » Tue Sep 04, 2018 7:29 am

Which is the way you want it. Well, you get it!
You run one time, you got yourself a set of chains. You run twice you got yourself two sets. You ain't gonna need no third set, 'cause you gonna get your mind right.

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Re: Sorry to Make You Cry XIV

Post by izittrue » Tue Sep 04, 2018 11:39 pm

Have I jinxed myself out of the jinx bonus?
Will Rogers -
- Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip

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Re: Sorry to Make You Cry XIV

Post by WildCat » Wed Sep 05, 2018 12:22 am

Gonna jump right in this year... Failcons.
Do you have questions about God?

you sniveling little right-wing nutter - jj

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Re: Sorry to Make You Cry XIV

Post by Anaxagoras » Wed Sep 05, 2018 4:08 am

Think I'll go with the Suckaneers for Week 1.
A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool.
William Shakespeare

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Re: Sorry to Make You Cry XIV

Post by Boss Higgins » Wed Sep 05, 2018 4:32 am

Alright!

You, Doc! Step out!

Boss Paul says you wasn't happy with your Grid of Despair!

Says you was complainin'!
Boss Paul says you wasn't happy with your job! That you was complainin'!

Well, we're goin' to give you a chance to think about it!

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Re: Sorry to Make You Cry XIV

Post by Doctor X » Wed Sep 05, 2018 4:43 am

No . . . these guys . . . said post . . . this:

:Waaaah: Current Week One Pickies:
*NFL Schedule

--J.D.[/font]

*I Haz Mulligans! Image
Mob of the Mean: Free beanie, cattle-prod and Charley Fan Club!
"Doctor X is just treating you the way he treats everyone--as subhuman crap too dumb to breathe in after you breathe out."--Don
DocX: FTW.--sparks
"Doctor X wins again."--Pyrrho
"Never sorry to make a racist Fucktard cry."--His Humble MagNIfIcence
"It was the criticisms of Doc X, actually, that let me see more clearly how far the hypocrisy had gone."--clarsct
"I'd leave it up to Doctor X who has been a benevolent tyrant so far."--Grammatron
"Indeed you are a river to your people.
Shit. That's going to end up in your sig."--Pyrrho
"Try a twelve step program and accept Doctor X as your High Power."--asthmatic camel
"just like Doc X said." --gnome

WS CHAMPIONS X3!!! NBA CHAMPIONS!! Stanley Cup! SB CHAMPIONS X5!!!!!
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Re: Sorry to Make You Cry XIV

Post by Boss Higgins » Wed Sep 05, 2018 4:44 am

Well, we're goin' to give you a chance to think about it!

Alright! Let's go!
Boss Paul says you wasn't happy with your job! That you was complainin'!

Well, we're goin' to give you a chance to think about it!

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Re: Sorry to Make You Cry XIV

Post by Dragline » Wed Sep 05, 2018 4:45 am

He ain't in the box because of the joke grid we gave him. He back-sassed a free man. They got their rules. We ain't got nothin' to do with that. Would probably have happened to him sooner or later anyway, a pontificator like him.

He gotta learn the rules the same as anybody else.
He ain't in the box because of the joke played on him. He back-sassed a free man. They got their rules. We ain't got nothin' to do with that. Would probably have happened to him sooner or later anyway, a complainer like him. He gotta learn the rules the same as anybody else.

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Re: Sorry to Make You Cry XIV

Post by Captain » Wed Sep 05, 2018 11:33 am

Boss Paul, put that boy Pyrrho to work fixin' that grid. Lot of gridiron to pave before sundown!

Meanwhile...you men get your minds right. For your own good.

http://pandoc.org/MANUAL.html#extension-pipe_tables
You run one time, you got yourself a set of chains. You run twice you got yourself two sets. You ain't gonna need no third set, 'cause you gonna get your mind right.

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Re: Sorry to Make You Cry XIV

Post by gnome » Thu Sep 06, 2018 1:17 am

Gonna jump right in with the copycat pick... Failcons also.
"If fighting is sure to result in victory, then you must fight! Sun Tzu said that, and I'd say he knows a little bit more about fighting than you do, pal, because he invented it, and then he perfected it so that no living man could best him in the ring of honor. Then, he used his fight money to buy two of every animal on earth, and then he herded them onto a boat, and then he beat the crap out of every single one. And from that day forward any time a bunch of animals are together in one place it's called a zoo! (Beat) Unless it's a farm!"
--Soldier, TF2

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Re: Sorry to Make You Cry XIV

Post by shemp » Thu Sep 06, 2018 3:42 am

I can't possibly participate in a game that celebrates a league that encourages its Negroes to shit upon the graves of those Heroic White Men who fought for the liberty and freedom of the citizens (and ONLY the citizens!) of the GREATEST COUNTRY ON EARTHTM!!!!!

:freedom: :freedom: :freedom: :freedom: :freedom: :freedom: :freedom: :freedom:

Nah, just kidding, I'm on the Failcons bandwagon too.
"It is not I who is mad! It is I who is crazy!" -- Ren Hoek

In ancient Rome
There was a poem
About a dog
Who found two bones
He picked at one
He licked the other
He went in circles
He dropped dead

Freedom of choice
Is what you got
Freedom from choice
Is what you want

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Doctor X
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Re: Sorry to Make You Cry XIV

Post by Doctor X » Thu Sep 06, 2018 4:32 am

Image

--J.D.
Last edited by Doctor X on Fri Sep 07, 2018 4:34 am, edited 3 times in total.
Mob of the Mean: Free beanie, cattle-prod and Charley Fan Club!
"Doctor X is just treating you the way he treats everyone--as subhuman crap too dumb to breathe in after you breathe out."--Don
DocX: FTW.--sparks
"Doctor X wins again."--Pyrrho
"Never sorry to make a racist Fucktard cry."--His Humble MagNIfIcence
"It was the criticisms of Doc X, actually, that let me see more clearly how far the hypocrisy had gone."--clarsct
"I'd leave it up to Doctor X who has been a benevolent tyrant so far."--Grammatron
"Indeed you are a river to your people.
Shit. That's going to end up in your sig."--Pyrrho
"Try a twelve step program and accept Doctor X as your High Power."--asthmatic camel
"just like Doc X said." --gnome

WS CHAMPIONS X3!!! NBA CHAMPIONS!! Stanley Cup! SB CHAMPIONS X5!!!!!
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Re: Sorry to Make You Cry XIV

Post by Anaxagoras » Thu Sep 06, 2018 5:55 am

It'll work. :)

I picked the Suckaneers by the way. :D
A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool.
William Shakespeare

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Re: Sorry to Make You Cry XIV

Post by Carr » Thu Sep 06, 2018 7:57 am

Anaxagoras wrote:
Thu Sep 06, 2018 5:55 am
It'll work. :)

I picked the Suckaneers by the way. :D
I hope you won't be a hard case.
Any man who don't keep order spends a night in the box!

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Re: Sorry to Make You Cry XIV

Post by Grammatron » Thu Sep 06, 2018 8:02 am

Faiders to lose

Love the new layout boss

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Re: Sorry to Make You Cry XIV

Post by Doctor X » Thu Sep 06, 2018 8:05 am

:bricks: Week One Standings:

Doctor X








Evolver
Enchantress
shemp
Radrick
Anaxagoras
Pyrrho
Wildcat
Grammatron
izittrue
gnome
Mentat
Fags

As always, check my math . . . yes, you may use your fingers. . . .



Evolver Asks Enchantress, "I'm Evolver from the U-S-A! You Must be a Fag!"



--J. "Not . . . That . . . There is Anything Wrong with it!" D.
Mob of the Mean: Free beanie, cattle-prod and Charley Fan Club!
"Doctor X is just treating you the way he treats everyone--as subhuman crap too dumb to breathe in after you breathe out."--Don
DocX: FTW.--sparks
"Doctor X wins again."--Pyrrho
"Never sorry to make a racist Fucktard cry."--His Humble MagNIfIcence
"It was the criticisms of Doc X, actually, that let me see more clearly how far the hypocrisy had gone."--clarsct
"I'd leave it up to Doctor X who has been a benevolent tyrant so far."--Grammatron
"Indeed you are a river to your people.
Shit. That's going to end up in your sig."--Pyrrho
"Try a twelve step program and accept Doctor X as your High Power."--asthmatic camel
"just like Doc X said." --gnome

WS CHAMPIONS X3!!! NBA CHAMPIONS!! Stanley Cup! SB CHAMPIONS X5!!!!!
2

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Re: Sorry to Make You Cry XIV

Post by Captain » Thu Sep 06, 2018 10:19 am

Pyrrho got his mind right.
You run one time, you got yourself a set of chains. You run twice you got yourself two sets. You ain't gonna need no third set, 'cause you gonna get your mind right.

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Re: Sorry to Make You Cry XIV

Post by Evolver » Thu Sep 06, 2018 5:46 pm

Phulladoltphia Igloos to ig-lose
2016 & 2018 NFL "Sorry To Make You Cry" Challenge Champion

"Rational arguments don't usually work on religious people. Otherwise, there would be no religious people." - Dr. Gregory House

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Re: Sorry to Make You Cry XIV

Post by Grammatron » Fri Sep 07, 2018 3:32 am

Tired of these pre-season games, can't wait for regular season to start