THE END

Bruce · Post by **Bruce** » Sat May 21, 2022 2:41 am

I do believe this year will be the year.

The one we've all been anticipating.

Global economic collapse.

Today we started running out of critical consumable supplies needed to do our jobs and make and test product. Supplies that were ordered months ago and are now listed as back-ordered for six months to a year. Vendors are no longer answering the phone or returning calls. Key employees are quitting and retiring daily. New hires are hopelessly stupid and don't even show up half the time. Not good.

I have a company strategic goal setting meeting on Monday. If they spend all three hours pretending the world isn't ending right now..........fuck.......its over. Really.

https://i.imgur.com/czrdF6O.jpg
You tell management that you can't run a single analysis because you're out of the only type of glass vials that fit into the machines and they don't even bat an eye, but if you don't fill out the bullshit forms explaining how you're going to leverage synergistic platforms to facilitate customer needs, they lose their goddamn minds.

robinson · Post by **robinson** » Sat May 21, 2022 2:52 am

Les riches et les puissants ne souffrent pas du manque d'approvisionnement.

Les politiciens ont déjà manqué un chèque de paie.

Bruce · Post by **Bruce** » Sat May 21, 2022 3:04 am

When the internet goes offline and the power grid shuts down, I don't think the tribes that will be fighting over the dwindling food and water supplies will find much use for an aging analytical scientist.
https://i.imgur.com/g2hujtR.jpg
Yes ma'am, as a matter of fact, I can still shovel shit. :worship:

robinson · Post by **robinson** » Sat May 21, 2022 3:16 am

When the trucks can’t deliver food, for any reason

Mass starvation begins in a week

robinson · Post by **robinson** » Sat May 21, 2022 3:18 am

Unless you are Amish or Mormon

They start starving in a week plus two days

Unless they have lots of ammo

Bruce · Post by **Bruce** » Sat May 21, 2022 3:30 am

Baby formula is gone. Small towns across the US are shutting down. Gas is no longer affordable. The end is here and now.

https://www.breezyscroll.com/world/enti ... -vacation/

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Sat May 21, 2022 6:10 am

– J.D.

Hotarubi · Post by **Hotarubi** » Sat May 21, 2022 12:11 pm

Bruce wrote: ↑Sat May 21, 2022 2:41 am
New hires are hopelessly stupid and don't even show up half the time. Not good.

Didn't you change jobs recently...

Hillary Clinton · Post by **Hillary Clinton** » Sat May 21, 2022 12:35 pm

Hotarubi wrote: ↑Sat May 21, 2022 12:11 pm
Bruce wrote: ↑Sat May 21, 2022 2:41 am
New hires are hopelessly stupid and don't even show up half the time. Not good.
Didn't you change jobs recently...

Yeah. He's working in the White House.

Hotarubi · Post by **Hotarubi** » Sat May 21, 2022 12:46 pm

Hillary Clinton wrote: ↑Sat May 21, 2022 12:35 pm
Hotarubi wrote: ↑Sat May 21, 2022 12:11 pm
Bruce wrote: ↑Sat May 21, 2022 2:41 am
New hires are hopelessly stupid and don't even show up half the time. Not good.
Didn't you change jobs recently...
Yeah. He's working in the White House.

Does it still sting a little bit?

Bruce · Post by **Bruce** » Sat May 21, 2022 1:55 pm

Hotarubi wrote: ↑Sat May 21, 2022 12:11 pm
Bruce wrote: ↑Sat May 21, 2022 2:41 am
New hires are hopelessly stupid and don't even show up half the time. Not good.
Didn't you change jobs recently...

It was more of a transition, from one level of Dante's inferno to another, so to speak.

shemp · Post by **shemp** » Sat May 21, 2022 10:58 pm

Bruce wrote: ↑Sat May 21, 2022 2:41 am I do believe this year will be the year.

The one we've all been anticipating.

Global economic collapse.

Today we started running out of critical consumable supplies needed to do our jobs and make and test product. Supplies that were ordered months ago and are now listed as back-ordered for six months to a year. Vendors are no longer answering the phone or returning calls. Key employees are quitting and retiring daily. New hires are hopelessly stupid and don't even show up half the time. Not good.

I have a company strategic goal setting meeting on Monday. If they spend all three hours pretending the world isn't ending right now..........fuck.......its over. Really.

https://i.imgur.com/czrdF6O.jpg
You tell management that you can't run a single analysis because you're out of the only type of glass vials that fit into the machines and they don't even bat an eye, but if you don't fill out the bullshit forms explaining how you're going to leverage synergistic platforms to facilitate customer needs, they lose their goddamn minds.

Reports. That's all that matters. You don't need to ever produce any actual results again. Just fill out your reports on time. You'll still be there twenty years from now filling out reports while the world burns.

I would retire now but they pay me too much money to do almost nothing except reports.

Lumbergh · Post by **Lumbergh** » Sat May 21, 2022 11:50 pm

Yeah...I'm gonna need you to go ahead and make sure you put the new cover sheets on those reports, m'kay?

Bruce · Post by **Bruce** » Sun May 22, 2022 12:02 am

shemp wrote: ↑Sat May 21, 2022 10:58 pm
Bruce wrote: ↑Sat May 21, 2022 2:41 am I do believe this year will be the year.

The one we've all been anticipating.

Global economic collapse.

Today we started running out of critical consumable supplies needed to do our jobs and make and test product. Supplies that were ordered months ago and are now listed as back-ordered for six months to a year. Vendors are no longer answering the phone or returning calls. Key employees are quitting and retiring daily. New hires are hopelessly stupid and don't even show up half the time. Not good.

I have a company strategic goal setting meeting on Monday. If they spend all three hours pretending the world isn't ending right now..........fuck.......its over. Really.

https://i.imgur.com/czrdF6O.jpg
You tell management that you can't run a single analysis because you're out of the only type of glass vials that fit into the machines and they don't even bat an eye, but if you don't fill out the bullshit forms explaining how you're going to leverage synergistic platforms to facilitate customer needs, they lose their goddamn minds.
Reports. That's all that matters. You don't need to ever produce any actual results again. Just fill out your reports on time. You'll still be there twenty years from now filling out reports while the world burns.

I would retire now but they pay me too much money to do almost nothing except reports.

I'm picturing myself sitting in my candle-lit office, a year from now, in a dark, powerless building, writing a report from memory, using a feather quill, when in walks my boss with her fancy gas lamp.

How's that report coming along? Whoa, whoa, that doesn't look like 11 pt Times New Roman.....

Bruce · Post by **Bruce** » Sun May 22, 2022 11:57 am

Meanwhile, on the other side of the planet......

https://www.reddit.com/r/interestingasf ... edium=mweb

......these people will run out of water within a few months .

Grammatron · Post by **Grammatron** » Mon May 23, 2022 1:32 am

I think it's important to realize that even in collapses things don't end. The world keeps going and changing into something else, but it's still there.

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Mon May 23, 2022 6:05 am

In other words, it does not give a fuck about you.

It does about moi, but then I am Special!

I have my own bus!

Wait. . . .

– J.D.

Pyrrho · Post by **Pyrrho** » Mon May 23, 2022 2:26 pm

https://www.npr.org/2022/05/23/11006553 ... new-record

An estimated 100 million people around the world are forcibly displaced, the highest number on record, according to the United Nations.

The figure represents 1% of the world's population and would be equivalent to the 14th most populous country, the U.N. said in its statement.

At the end of 2021, 90 million had been displaced from their countries, including 14.4 million people displaced within their countries' borders due to violence. An estimated 23.7 million people, mostly in the Asia-Pacific region, were displaced internally in 2021 due to natural disasters.

Pyrrho · Post by **Pyrrho** » Mon May 23, 2022 2:31 pm

Bruce wrote: ↑Sat May 21, 2022 3:04 am When the internet goes offline and the power grid shuts down, I don't think the tribes that will be fighting over the dwindling food and water supplies will find much use for an aging analytical scientist.
https://i.imgur.com/g2hujtR.jpg
Yes ma'am, as a matter of fact, I can still shovel shit. :worship:

At least we know from that documentary that there will be eyeshadow and lip rouge in the post-apocalyptic world.

sparks · Post by **sparks** » Mon May 23, 2022 4:04 pm

That's not bad, but get hungry enough...

Ben Trovado · Post by **Ben Trovado** » Mon May 23, 2022 5:32 pm

Pyrrho wrote: ↑Mon May 23, 2022 2:31 pm
Bruce wrote: ↑Sat May 21, 2022 3:04 am When the internet goes offline and the power grid shuts down, I don't think the tribes that will be fighting over the dwindling food and water supplies will find much use for an aging analytical scientist.
https://i.imgur.com/g2hujtR.jpg
Yes ma'am, as a matter of fact, I can still shovel shit. :worship:
At least we know from that documentary that there will be eyeshadow and lip rouge in the post-apocalyptic world.

I have been hoarding it right next to my ammo.

Bruce · Post by **Bruce** » Tue May 24, 2022 2:28 am

We had our strategic goals meeting. First one for me at the new job. It was the same bullshit as wiith every company except for two key differences.

1) The "Ask the leadership team" portion included very cut-thoat questions that never would have been voiced in previous years for fear of retaliation. The smartly dressed high level folks that you never see except in these meetings were clearly taken off gaurd, babbling nonsense that didn't even relate to the questions. I'm guessing they will be hiring PR experts to take questions starting next quarter.

2) It was very clear from all the employees in all departments, and even middle management, that we've had enough of this nonsense. I felt this especially from new hires who thought they had escaped this garbage when the left there last job.

This might be the year for actual change......or more of history getting ready to repeat itself.

Lumbergh · Post by **Lumbergh** » Tue May 24, 2022 10:51 am

Yeah... we're going to go ahead and bring in Bob Slidell to go ahead and get everyone in alignment on those questions so we don't have any glitches. It'll be great.

Bruce · Post by **Bruce** » Wed May 25, 2022 11:23 am

This guy was Gary Cole's inspiration for Lumberg:

https://www.google.com/search?q=mike+ju ... ,st:345.86

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Wed May 25, 2022 1:54 pm

If you look carefully, at the end of the film, the foreman, wearing a shirt and tie and holding a coffee mug, approaches them. . . .

– J.D.

Lumbergh · Post by **Lumbergh** » Wed May 25, 2022 2:32 pm

Yeah...

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Wed May 25, 2022 3:14 pm

That is indeed it.

Judge did not want it to be a "downer" by actually killing off what became an iconic character, and I think he was wise not to make the ending message that "there's always a Lumbergh" too obvious.

According to Cole, he based the "Yeaaaaaah" on the character voiced by Judge in his cartoon shorts based on Milton. Think the Hippie Teacher in Beavis and Butthead with a coffee cup. Cole argued that he was happy to do it, and it would fit the character:

– J.D.

Lumbergh · Post by **Lumbergh** » Wed May 25, 2022 3:23 pm

Yeah...more bulk in these threads, m'kay?

Ooh...looks like a glitch. Hmm.

sparks · Post by **sparks** » Wed May 25, 2022 5:45 pm

Yea, that's not so great Humbug.

Pyrrho · Post by **Pyrrho** » Thu May 26, 2022 11:50 pm

Twit: https://twitter.com/michaelshermer/status/1529950027115704320

Whatever you say, Slick.

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Fri May 27, 2022 8:37 am

How did that whole Prior to #MeToo work out?

– J.D.

Hotarubi · Post by **Hotarubi** » Fri May 27, 2022 7:53 pm

Doctor X wrote: ↑Fri May 27, 2022 8:37 am How did that whole Prior to #MeToo work out?

– J.D.

What is Spermer wibbling about now?

Bruce · Post by **Bruce** » Mon May 30, 2022 2:32 pm

School shootings have become so common that the "moment of silence for the victims" is becoming a standard practice at sporting events.

Bruce · Post by **Bruce** » Sun Aug 28, 2022 5:25 pm

Elon Musk says there aren't 'enough people,' birthrate could threaten human civilization

Business mogul Elon Musk is more concerned with under-population than over-population. The Tesla CEO said Monday that there are "not enough people" in the world and it could threaten human civilization.

"I think one of the biggest risks to civilization is the low birth rate and the rapidly declining birthrate," Musk said at the Wall Street Journal's annual CEO Council. The 50-year-old was answering a question about how the proposed Tesla Bot could solve some of the world's labor issues. Musk had previously called the bot a "generalized substitute for human labor over time."

And who is going to repair your bots when they break down Mr. Musk? Phil? He retired last week. Bob? He died 3 years ago. Bode? We hired him to replace Phil when he turned in his 2-week notice, and 2 weeks wasn't enough time for him to learn the programming language that operates the bots. Oh yeah, and you made us fire Bode because he was hired as WFH, and we didn’t have an office space for him. Maybe Janice in accounting? She's 75 and seems to be pretty good with numbers, as long as she doesn't forget her meds.

Seriously though, every company seems to be relying on one or two key individuals in every department to keep things running, and those individuals are past the typical retirement age, and none of them have a younger apprentice to teach. Every department is working with ancient software and hardware that's falling apart, there's no plans to upgrade or innovate, and all of the IT "support" has been outsourced.

Raise your hand if you are working for a company that's exactly one network crash away from a total shutdown and absolutely no contingency plan, let alone cash reserves. Ok, now raise your hand if you're working for a company that is somehow continuing to pay you, but you can't figure how that's possible because every product delivery has been delayed or canceled for the past 3 years? Ok, you can put down both hands.

I'm still saying global economic collapse by end of this year. I'm not betting cause I can't afford to lose, and if I win, your money will be worthless anyway. :P

Ben Trovado · Post by **Ben Trovado** » Mon Aug 29, 2022 3:39 pm

Bruce wrote: ↑Sat May 21, 2022 1:55 pm
Hotarubi wrote: ↑Sat May 21, 2022 12:11 pm
Bruce wrote: ↑Sat May 21, 2022 2:41 am
New hires are hopelessly stupid and don't even show up half the time. Not good.
Didn't you change jobs recently...
It was more of a transition, from one level of Dante's inferno to another, so to speak.

Are you in the circle with the car salesmen and men who wear wide, white belts?

If so, say hello to Josh.

robinson2 · Post by **robinson2** » Mon Aug 29, 2022 5:45 pm

Bruce wrote: ↑Sun Aug 28, 2022 5:25 pm I'm still saying global economic collapse by end of this year.

One nations collapse is another nations opportunity.

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