The NFL "Sorry to Make You Cry" Challenge IX

Pyrrho · Post by **Pyrrho** » Thu Jan 23, 2014 12:02 pm

Assuming, of course, that Cleveland has an act that it can get together.

:cowbell:

Grammatron · Post by **Grammatron** » Thu Jan 23, 2014 10:25 pm

Doctor X wrote:You know . . . there is a "big" UK following for the Patriots for some odd reason. One fan is an ex-special forces who deals with security in Afghanistan and Iraq.

Why is all of that important?

Said guy explained the football soccer rankings in the UK to the Official Pats Press Dudes [All Rights Reserv'd by Robert Kraft. Do not fuck with him.--Ed.]. How teams can be "demoted" to a lower level for failure to perform.

The Official Pats Press Dudes love the idea--"someone get Robert on the line!"--and could you imagine it? You would have a real "minor league" for football that is not called "America's Hat" and it would force poorly run teams--sorry Pyrrho--to get their acts together.

In a way we already have it. Current pundits have already declared that next year, if everyone is healthy--always an "if" in the NFL--we have the Patriots, Indy, a fight between Baltimore and Pittsburgh, Denver fighting with KC and, of course, Seattle, Niners, New Orleans, and Some Team from the NFC East which Means Dallas is on the East Coast. Certain teams have gotten their "acts together."

Pats Fan Boys [Tm.--Ed.] will bleat "the Pats shoulda been 14-2 and hosting Penis Head I Won This Game as a Team in Foxboroug(h)!!!" Cooler heads will remind them they "shoulda" lost to New Orleans and Cleveland and been 10-6. The games turn on such fine lines to mix metaphors like a fine mist of concrete.

But Jacksonville? Cleveland? Detroit? Oakland? . . . perhaps they need to be demoted for a few years and be forced to get their acts together.

--J.D.

I am familiar with that sytem and I like it, but it only works if you have a great number of teams. I always thought that it would work best with college football (except make it semi-pro as it should be) that way you can have many different divisions and teams moving up and down according to their ability.

As for NFL, it's ownership. Detroit actually has a good team on paper, maybe switching coaches will help. Hell, SF went from garbage to a powerhouse and all they did is switch coaches. The rest, well...good luck to the sports fans in those cities (sorry Pyrrho).

Pyrrho · Post by **Pyrrho** » Thu Jan 23, 2014 11:37 pm

Well we have a new coach. Now all we need is a quarterback.

Tiosylanyl · Post by **Tiosylanyl** » Fri Jan 24, 2014 1:27 am

Pyrrho wrote:Well we have a new coach. Now all we need is a quarterback.

I hear Vince Young is available and looking for a steady source of income.

http://i80.photobucket.com/albums/j191/ ... 8c10d8.jpg

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Fri Jan 24, 2014 2:30 am

Might as well go with Vince Neal. . . .

--J.D.

izittrue · Post by **izittrue** » Fri Jan 31, 2014 5:35 pm

Is it next year yet? Denver to lose. We need a Super Bowl betting post. You know how many turnovers ..how many times we will hear Omaha... How many field goals etc.

Anaxagoras · Post by **Anaxagoras** » Sun Feb 02, 2014 5:43 am

The seagulls to lose.

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Sun Feb 02, 2014 7:35 am

:Waaaah:Current Division Round Week Pickies:

NFL Schedule

--J.D.

Pyrrho · Post by **Pyrrho** » Sun Feb 02, 2014 1:09 pm

Sea Chickens to flounder.

grayman · Post by **grayman** » Sun Feb 02, 2014 2:53 pm

Denever does diddly.

Pyrrho · Post by **Pyrrho** » Sun Feb 02, 2014 5:33 pm

AFGHANISTAN — Deep in the most remote regions of Afghanistan, loyal San Francisco 49er fans serving in a Recon platoon are eagerly awaiting news of their beloved football team, and speculating on how satisfying it will be to beat the “Sheattle Cheathawks” in their own domain.

Lance Cpl. Richard Gutierrez, a San Francisco native now stationed at Camp Pendleton, considers himself an expert in all things NFL.

“It’s gonna be a tough match, for sure,” Gutierrez said as he ripped open his pizza MRE. “But the Niners have won all their away games in the playoffs and have better game stats in the latter half of the season. Even with the unfair advantage of having better fans and those bullshit top-seed home game rules, Kap can easily drive it home for us.”

http://www.duffelblog.com/2014/02/super-bowl-49ers/

grayman · Post by **grayman** » Sun Feb 02, 2014 10:17 pm

[youtube]hfeRDQfQnvU[/youtube]

Anaxagoras · Post by **Anaxagoras** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 12:39 am

Wow, what else can go wrong for Denver?

jacks · Post by **jacks** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 1:26 am

Anaxagoras wrote:Wow, what else can go wrong for Denver?

not over yet.

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 1:32 am

jacks wrote:
Anaxagoras wrote:Wow, what else can go wrong for Denver?
not over yet.

Fat Lady is warming up.

--J.D.

jacks · Post by **jacks** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 1:33 am

Doctor X wrote:
jacks wrote:
Anaxagoras wrote:Wow, what else can go wrong for Denver?
not over yet.
Fat Lady is warming up.

--J.D.

So i see.

Evolver · Post by **Evolver** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 1:43 am

The Kitten Bowl was a better game.

Pyrrho · Post by **Pyrrho** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 2:00 am

:cowbell:

silverdrake · Post by **silverdrake** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 2:02 am

Isn't it just embarrassing for Denver at this point?

I mean, they should just concede and walk away.

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 2:05 am

Peyton?

That fetid liquid oozing down the drain behind you?

That is your legacy.

--J.D.

Pyrrho · Post by **Pyrrho** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 2:08 am

This Superbowl is just as good as if the Browns were playing in it.

Tiosylanyl · Post by **Tiosylanyl** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 2:59 am

Worst...Superbowl....EVAR......

Anaxagoras · Post by **Anaxagoras** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 3:01 am

Man, from the very first play of the game. It was garbage time by the fourth quarter.

My wife watched that first play that went for a safety and asked me "I don't get it! What happened?" I tried to explain that wasn't supposed to happen. She stopped watching after that.

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 3:35 am

There is no way this should not diminish the Quarter Back . . . of . . . DESTinY's legacy.

--J.D.

jacks · Post by **jacks** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 4:36 am

I fell asleep what happen?

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 4:39 am

The Red Sox won the World Series :hyper:

--J.D.

WildCat · Post by **WildCat** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 5:27 am

:dothewave: :bananallama: :hyper: :earth: :propeller: :laugher: :dc: :hysterical: :dgc: :pb: :CanoWorms2: :dbroccoli: :groupdance: :corn: :hooray:

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 6:07 am

Someone will be choosing a gay movie.

--J.D.

Anaxagoras · Post by **Anaxagoras** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 9:23 am

http://weknowmemes.com/wp-content/uploa ... anning.jpg

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 11:56 am

:bricks: Super Bowl Standings:

208 Wildcat Mia (8), Chi (8), Ind (19), NYJ (8), SF (24), KC (13), MP (2), Sea (47), Det (7), NO (17), STL (7), GB (8), Car (12), NE (13), Den 15

193.5 jacks NYG (7), NYJ (8), Mia (8), Ten (7), MP (3), NO (17), KC (13), Sea (47), NE (22), Az (12.5), Phi (10), Ind (12), SF (14), Den 15

189.5 Pyrrho Bal (8), NYJ (8), Mia (8), MP (4), Dal (8), Pit (10.5), SF (24), Cle (4), Den (31), Sea (47), Chi (8), SF (14), NE (13)
187 izittrue GB (12.5), SF (24), Oak (4), Det (7), Ten (7), NYJ (8), MP (1), Dal (8), KC (13), Az (12.5), Sea (47), Chi (8), Bal (8), Ind (12), Den 15

179.5 Tiosylanyl GB (12.5), SF (24), Mia (8), NYJ (8), KC (13), MP (2), Sea (47), NE (22), Chi (8), Bal (8), NO (12), Den 15

164.5 swellman NYG (7), Was (3), Dal (8), NO (17), NYJ (8), SD (15), Cle (4), Den (31), KC (13), Ind (19), Bal (8), Az (12.5), GB (8), NE (14)
162.5 Grammatron Bal (8), Az (12.5), Mia (8), Oak (4), Den (31), MP (4), Was (3), Cin (15), KC (13), Chi (8), NO (17), Ten (7), Dal (8), SD (10), SF (14)
160 Radrick GB (12.5), SF (24), Mia (8), Ten (7), Dal (8), KC (13), MP (2), Car (16), Cin (15), SD (15), Az (12.5), Ind (12), Den 15

156 Doctor X Bal (8), MP (19), Mia (8), Det (7), Ten (7), Cle (4), Dal (8), Den (31), KC (13), Car (16), Cin (15), Chi (8), Ind (12)

145 Evolver Bal (8), SF (24), Hou (2), Ten (7), NYJ (8), Dal (8), KC (13), Den (31), MP (1), NO (17), Car (16), Ind (12)

136.5 grayman Atl (3), Car (16), TB (4), Chi (8), NO (17), Dal (8), Pit (10.5), SF (24), MP (1), Tex (2), Mia (8), Chi (8), Ind (12), Den 15

124.5 Lizard People Pit (10.5), Oak (4), Chi (8), Dal (8), MP (1), Den (31), Sea (47), Bal (8), DSB (6)
123 gnome SD (15), TB (4), Dal (8), Bal (8), Mia (8), Den (31), MP (3), Car (16), NO (17), Ind (12)
121 Enchantress GB (12.5), Was (3), Mia (8), Det (7), Buf (6), Dal (8), KC (13), Den (31), NO (17), MP (2), Az (12.5)

116 Anaxagoras Phi (14), Det (7), Ten (7), Cle (4), NYJ (8), Dal (8), KC (13), SD (15), Ind (19), SF (14)

18.5 bcurnutte Pit (10.5), STL (7)

As always, check my math . . . yes, you may use your fingers. . . .

http://i170.photobucket.com/albums/u264 ... ghtSon.jpg

Wildcat Says, "Well, I Am King!"

--J. "Is an Offensive Weapon it is!" D.

jacks · Post by **jacks** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 12:31 pm

Congrats WildCat, and Doc thanks for hosting the game.

Evolver · Post by **Evolver** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 2:10 pm

Peyton was initially the Greatest Of All Time.

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 3:38 pm

I never felt he was, but he was "entering the conversation."

Now?

Nope.

--J.D.

Evolver · Post by **Evolver** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 7:47 pm

Doctor X wrote:I never felt he was, but he was "entering the conversation."

Now?

Nope.

--J.D.

Sorry, Doc, I guess I was being to subtle for you.

Initially G.O.A.T.

izittrue · Post by **izittrue** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 9:13 pm

Congrats and thanks Dr X. Bring on baseball so I can say wait til next year.

Anaxagoras · Post by **Anaxagoras** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 9:50 pm

Thanks Doc, I had fun too!

This is weird. Some of you may have seen the Troofer who interrupted the post-game press conference.

Apparently the head coach of the Seahawks is also a Troofer! (Also Macklemore too)

Will this idiocy never die? How can a person who is intelligent and competent enough to coach an NFL team to the super bowl and win also believe this nonsense?

Grammatron · Post by **Grammatron** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 10:26 pm

Anaxagoras wrote:Thanks Doc, I had fun too!

This is weird. Some of you may have seen the Troofer who interrupted the post-game press conference.

Apparently the head coach of the Seahawks is also a Troofer! (Also Macklemore too)

Will this idiocy never die? How can a person who is intelligent and competent enough to coach an NFL team to the super bowl and win also believe this nonsense?

I would understand someone like a competent NFL coach being a troofer. The job requires insane amount of hours to study film and create plays. It leaves very little to other things, particularly something like 9/11. So if in that tiny window that person is exposed to glossy bullshit I could see them becoming a troofer.

Grammatron · Post by **Grammatron** » Mon Feb 03, 2014 10:28 pm

Once again Doctor X did a great job of juggling picks and numbers, thank you!

grayman · Post by **grayman** » Tue Feb 04, 2014 12:17 am

Thanks Doctor X! It was fun and I did better than I initially thought I would.

Pyrrho · Post by **Pyrrho** » Tue Feb 04, 2014 12:18 am

This was my best year ever in this contest. I almost didn't cry.