A Thought for the Day

Hotarubi · Post by **Hotarubi** » Fri Sep 17, 2021 11:18 pm

Has this thread become one-fourth serious and three-fourths comical ?

xouper · Post by **xouper** » Sat Sep 18, 2021 7:40 am

A whole book full of thoughts:

https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/51VootEee-L.jpg

Elon Musk's Little Book of Selected Quotes: on Science, Innovation, and Entrepreneurship
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B09G1YZ4VC/

Kindle version still free as I write this.

Hotarubi · Post by **Hotarubi** » Sat Sep 18, 2021 8:54 am

I've been trolled lots on Twitter. But I understand trolls for what they are and I don't let them get to me. They take my bait, so I'm in charge of the discourse

~ Kenneth Goldsmith

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Sun Sep 19, 2021 9:30 am

A lot of mothers tell me, um, what a good child their child is. And quite often I have to unfortunately tell the same mothers and fathers that your child was a good child, but that's when he was a child.

– Judge Clifton Newman, sentencing Nathaniel David Rowland

– J.D.

robinson · Post by **robinson** » Sun Sep 26, 2021 2:32 am

https://twitter.com/thebabylonbee/statu ... 21920?s=21

Pyrrho · Post by **Pyrrho** » Tue Sep 28, 2021 1:25 am

https://i.imgur.com/Ov4gj5S.jpg

xouper · Post by **xouper** » Tue Sep 28, 2021 1:28 am

Answer: "It's dihydrogen monoxide. Don't drink it."

robinson · Post by **robinson** » Tue Sep 28, 2021 5:20 am

My view is simple

The glass is completely full

Half water, half atmosphere

Ben Trovado · Post by **Ben Trovado** » Tue Sep 28, 2021 5:23 am

robinson wrote: ↑Tue Sep 28, 2021 5:20 am My view is simple

The glass is completely full

Half water, half atmosphere

My thought is "This is really going to hurt the waiter's tip. Why hasn't he refilled it?"

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Tue Sep 28, 2021 5:41 am

Half-dirty.

– J.D.

robinson · Post by **robinson** » Tue Sep 28, 2021 1:31 pm

https://twitter.com/catturd2/status/144 ... 25896?s=21

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Fri Oct 01, 2021 8:32 am

– J.D.

Hotarubi · Post by **Hotarubi** » Fri Oct 01, 2021 11:22 am

I was perusing the channels on TV the other night and came across an old episode of "most haunted". This particular segment featured a then "live" broadcast from Prague. Soon, I was sitting there pouring scorn at how convenient it was that a 16th century ghost from East Central Europe was communicating in not Czech, or Slovak, but...Modern English when, the host helpfully explained that when you die there is a Universal language for ghosts that, conveniently for watchers in the UK, is estuary English.

Boy did I feel stupid.

Hotarubi · Post by **Hotarubi** » Fri Oct 01, 2021 11:29 am

Taking this one post further than is necessary, I'd just like to thank YHWH, Allah, Vishnu, Inanna etc. for "getting round the table" and abandoning Sanskrit, Plains Arabic, Paleo Hebrew, Neolithic Ug et al and decide on a dialect that suits 2.1 million viewers over the other 100 billion people that have ever existed.

Thumbs up, guys.

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Fri Oct 01, 2021 4:54 pm

England prevails.

– J.D.

Hotarubi · Post by **Hotarubi** » Fri Oct 01, 2021 9:49 pm

Jesus buried King Arthur y' know.

Hotarubi · Post by **Hotarubi** » Fri Oct 01, 2021 9:59 pm

People say Yoga will change your life. I think that's a bit of a stretch.

~ Suggs.

robinson · Post by **robinson** » Tue Oct 05, 2021 1:13 pm

robinson wrote: ↑Thu Oct 26, 2006 4:51 pm I put the village idiot on ignore. I don't care if you think you have the secret of the Universe and the answer to all knowledge, if you can't understand something simple, how can you understand something complex?

Ben Trovado · Post by **Ben Trovado** » Tue Oct 05, 2021 7:51 pm

Doctor X wrote: ↑Tue Sep 28, 2021 5:41 am Half-dirty.

– J.D.

Only if done half-right.

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Wed Oct 06, 2021 3:25 am

https://i.imgur.com/JLd6bFm.gif

– J.D.

Hotarubi · Post by **Hotarubi** » Wed Oct 06, 2021 8:22 am

Doctor X wrote: ↑Wed Oct 06, 2021 3:25 am https://i.imgur.com/JLd6bFm.gif

– J.D.

Are the Yankees the new Atlanta?

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Wed Oct 06, 2021 1:34 pm

Well, at least Atlanta made it to a Super Bowl in the last decade.

– J.D.

P.S.

The Red Sox are officially the Yankees’ daddy

Remember the way history always seemed determined to trample the Red Sox, torture their fans, tease every acre of New England?

“Relax,” Yogi Berra famously told Bernie Williams in 1999, before the ancient rivals played their first-ever postseason series. “We’ve been beating these guys for 80 years.”

Well the ghosts have vanished. All that awful history has evaporated. It is 18 years since the Yankees have beaten the Red Sox in October. Since 2004 it’s Boston 3, Yankees 0. We have officially reached the point that Pedro Martinez’s old chestnut has been reversed.

The Sox are the Yanks’ daddy.

New York Sun

Pyrrho · Post by **Pyrrho** » Thu Oct 07, 2021 12:26 pm

@donaldblackjr
people are uncomfortable when you see more than they can and you can’t be controlled

Hotarubi · Post by **Hotarubi** » Fri Oct 08, 2021 12:22 am

Doctor X wrote: ↑Wed Oct 06, 2021 1:34 pm Well, at least Atlanta made it to a Super Bowl in the last decade.

– J.D.

P.S.
The Red Sox are officially the Yankees’ daddy

Remember the way history always seemed determined to trample the Red Sox, torture their fans, tease every acre of New England?

“Relax,” Yogi Berra famously told Bernie Williams in 1999, before the ancient rivals played their first-ever postseason series. “We’ve been beating these guys for 80 years.”

Well the ghosts have vanished. All that awful history has evaporated. It is 18 years since the Yankees have beaten the Red Sox in October. Since 2004 it’s Boston 3, Yankees 0. We have officially reached the point that Pedro Martinez’s old chestnut has been reversed.

The Sox are the Yanks’ daddy.

New York Sun

It's almost as if there's a curse.

Hotarubi · Post by **Hotarubi** » Fri Oct 08, 2021 12:30 am

After suffering for years with alcohol related depression, I decided to hand my soul over to our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and embrace his teachings to alleviate my suffering.

Three days later, after a huge special brew binge, I trod on a plank that had a nail sticking up, which pierced my foot and had me hopping around in agony. Explain that one, bible cunts.

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Fri Oct 08, 2021 5:50 am

Stigmata.

– J.D.

Pyrrho · Post by **Pyrrho** » Fri Oct 08, 2021 12:37 pm

St. Hotarubi of Tetanus

Ben Trovado · Post by **Ben Trovado** » Fri Oct 08, 2021 2:57 pm

"You think YOU have a nail story?!"
- Jesus

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Fri Oct 08, 2021 4:43 pm

"Could you cross your legs? I've only got one nail left."

– Centurion

– J.D.

Ben Trovado · Post by **Ben Trovado** » Mon Oct 11, 2021 7:00 pm

Quote for the day:

"What the hell was THAT?"
- Hirohito

. . . too soon?

Ben Trovado · Post by **Ben Trovado** » Mon Oct 11, 2021 8:35 pm

Should that have gone into the Japan thread?

Pyrrho · Post by **Pyrrho** » Mon Oct 11, 2021 9:08 pm

https://twitter.com/jamesheathers/statu ... 1532982273

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Fri Oct 15, 2021 7:16 am

We saved Britain's ass in World War II. And they get to relive that Hell by watching the New York Jets play football.

– Urinating Tree

– J.D.

Pyrrho · Post by **Pyrrho** » Fri Oct 15, 2021 12:17 pm

"Hey! Ya make a better door than a window!" --Dad, trying to watch football when one of us blocked the view of the TV.

Pyrrho · Post by **Pyrrho** » Sat Oct 16, 2021 1:55 pm

"If in doubt fall on your arse." -- Fred Karno

ed · Post by ed » Sat Oct 16, 2021 2:30 pm

https://res.cloudinary.com/teepublic/im ... 6616_0.jpg

Worth repeating.

Pyrrho · Post by **Pyrrho** » Sat Oct 16, 2021 2:38 pm

Yeah, abusive behavior is all too common.

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Sun Oct 17, 2021 8:29 am

There is a holy, mistaken zeal in politics, as well as in religion. By persuading others, we convince ourselves.

– Junius

– J.D.

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Sun Oct 17, 2021 6:19 pm

Last year marked the 40th anniversary of the release of “Airplane!,” the comedy I wrote and directed with my brother Jerry and our friend Jim Abrahams. Just before the world shut down, Paramount held a screening at the Egyptian Theatre in Hollywood, followed by a Q&A in which an audience member asked a question we never used to receive: “Could you make ‘Airplane!’ today?”

My response: “Of course, we could. Just without the jokes.”

– David Zucker

– J.D.

Pyrrho · Post by **Pyrrho** » Tue Oct 19, 2021 12:33 am

@micahinATL
I had a professor in undergrad who, when talking about a person who did massive harm while alive, would stomp her foot on the ground a couple times and yell “how ya doing down there buddy?”