Heathens' corner

Witness · Post by **Witness** » Tue Jan 15, 2019 2:55 am

https://i.imgur.com/qCINcxZ.jpg

sparks · Post by **sparks** » Tue Jan 15, 2019 4:59 am

Appropriate.

Anaxagoras · Post by **Anaxagoras** » Tue Jan 15, 2019 12:05 pm

They knew

sparks · Post by **sparks** » Tue Jan 15, 2019 4:53 pm

One can hope so, or it belongs in the Chasm of Dumbth thread.

Anaxagoras · Post by **Anaxagoras** » Tue Jan 15, 2019 11:12 pm

A double entendre. Both meanings are intended.

Witness · Post by **Witness** » Wed Jan 16, 2019 1:21 am

https://i.imgur.com/t19hMec.gif

Anaxagoras · Post by **Anaxagoras** » Fri Jan 18, 2019 10:20 am

https://i.redd.it/b5oev40rn3b21.jpg

Oh dear.

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Fri Jan 18, 2019 10:26 am

You win Your Mom an Internet.

--J.D.

P.S. Wow Your Mom [STOP IT!--Ed.] I think I mentioned a long time ago as a Wee Spud when the movies Ruthless People and Aliens came out, a local theater--a place where one traveled in order to view Your Mom celluloid diversions--was also hiring and daily changed their sign:

Ruthless People
Now Hiring
Aliens

Aliens
Now Hiring
Ruthless People

Et cetera.

Anyways, they KNEW this, obviously.

How the Your Mom fuck do these people not see this?

I blame sparks.

--J.D.

sparks · Post by **sparks** » Fri Jan 18, 2019 4:32 pm

I live to serve.

ed · Post by ed » Fri Jan 18, 2019 4:39 pm

It does not rise to the level of double entendre. It is single.

It is the devil's work

sparks · Post by **sparks** » Fri Jan 18, 2019 5:01 pm

Which part are you getting ed? The implication of the blow job or the implication of the spoken word.... :)

sparks · Post by **sparks** » Sat Jan 19, 2019 12:19 am

Thanks for sparing us. :)

Witness · Post by **Witness** » Sat Jan 19, 2019 4:46 am

Saudi teen granted asylum in Canada drinks wine, eats bacon in Snapchat images

https://i.imgur.com/NOe99Ai.jpg

https://www.newshub.co.nz/home/world/20 ... mages.html

:MuhammadBoom:

sparks · Post by **sparks** » Sat Jan 19, 2019 5:35 am

Good for her.

Fuck a bunch of religulous delusional old fuckers who think Allah has given them the complete list of rulz.

Witness · Post by **Witness** » Mon Jan 21, 2019 4:03 am

Contraceptive pill can be taken every day of the month, after scientists dismiss 'Pope rule'

The contraceptive pill can be taken every day of the month, new NHS guidance says as scientists have successfully dismissed the original seven-day break brought in so "the Pope would accept it" as natural.

New guidelines from the Faculty of Sexual and Reproductive Healthcare (FSRH), who set key national guidelines for the safe prescription of contraceptives, highlight that there is no health benefit to the traditional seven-day break in taking the combined contraceptive pill and scientists say the change will prevent more unwanted pregnancies.

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2019/0 ... ssion=true

Witness · Post by **Witness** » Wed Jan 23, 2019 3:22 am

https://i.imgur.com/bBT7mLx.jpg

Witness · Post by **Witness** » Thu Jan 24, 2019 2:51 am

https://i.imgur.com/mW6t0bi.jpg

Witness · Post by **Witness** » Fri Jan 25, 2019 2:33 am

https://i.imgur.com/ZIPdZXL.jpg

:twisted:

xouper · Post by **xouper** » Fri Jan 25, 2019 10:26 am

Abdul Alhazred wrote: ↑Fri Jan 25, 2019 9:58 am OK. What am I looking at? :?

If I were to guess, I'd say it looks like five adults coming to the sudden realization they are all about to incur God's wrath because of a total immersion baptism ceremony gone a bit "off script" wherein someone accidentally — and with considerable lack of forethought — dropped the baby who then conked his (or her, or xir) head on the sharp edge of the finely sculpted and polished marble baptistery (or baptismal font) causing permanent major brain damage and now they are all going to hell, except for the kind soul who volunteered (prior to incarnation) to play the role of the baby for this gig and will be going back home to heaven after a few decades of helping a plethora of medical experts and support staff feel useful and needed. It's difficult to tell for certain from the photograph what kind of medical insurance the baby has, but perhaps a reasonable inference can be made based on the attire of the attendees. If more details would be helpful, I will be happy to oblige.

Witness · Post by **Witness** » Sat Jan 26, 2019 2:37 am

https://i.imgur.com/QRjnrr5.jpg

sparks · Post by **sparks** » Sun Jan 27, 2019 11:17 pm

Yet another unshaven tit-head.

Witness · Post by **Witness** » Mon Jan 28, 2019 12:44 am

https://i.imgur.com/EAVuk5S.jpg

:notsure:

Witness · Post by **Witness** » Mon Jan 28, 2019 1:48 am

Abdul Alhazred wrote: ↑Mon Jan 28, 2019 12:52 am On purpose or an apparition? :BigGrin3:

Must have grown miraculously. :P

Witness · Post by **Witness** » Wed Jan 30, 2019 12:51 am

https://i.imgur.com/SiwJt7F.jpg

Anaxagoras · Post by **Anaxagoras** » Wed Jan 30, 2019 12:53 am

Is there something wrong with the other nails?

How does she wash her feet?

Witness · Post by **Witness** » Wed Jan 30, 2019 1:21 am

Anaxagoras wrote: ↑Wed Jan 30, 2019 12:53 am Is there something wrong with the other nails?

Why, did Jesus complain about Roman hardware?

Anaxagoras wrote: ↑Wed Jan 30, 2019 12:53 am How does she wash her feet?

Holy water, stands to reason.

:P :P :P :P :P

Witness · Post by **Witness** » Wed Jan 30, 2019 1:48 am

Abdul Alhazred wrote: ↑Wed Jan 30, 2019 1:27 am Bad case of toenail fungus + gold leaf.

Prayed for a healing, got a cute little apparition instead.

There's an old joke about Lourdes: paralyzed kid comes on a wheelchair, prayers, sacred waters, &c. And a miracle happens!… A brand new set of tires.

Witness · Post by **Witness** » Thu Jan 31, 2019 4:18 am

https://i.imgur.com/dlUZwry.jpg

Witness · Post by **Witness** » Fri Feb 01, 2019 1:17 am

https://i.imgur.com/NLgOXkn.jpg

Is Anax safe? :notsure:

sparks · Post by **sparks** » Fri Feb 01, 2019 5:50 am

Jeebus. How does she get from 'Japanese' to 'Satan's children' ?

Oh, that's right: Christianity.

Anaxagoras · Post by **Anaxagoras** » Fri Feb 01, 2019 6:26 am

I assume that's supposed to be parody

sparks · Post by **sparks** » Fri Feb 01, 2019 4:23 pm

Indeed.

Witness · Post by **Witness** » Sat Feb 02, 2019 2:52 am

Abdul Alhazred wrote: ↑Fri Feb 01, 2019 10:08 am Us rational beings know it's the Swiss. :evil:

Chocolate-mongering bastards. :notsure:

Belgian chocolate is better. :)

https://i.imgur.com/zQfYbjW.jpg

Witness · Post by **Witness** » Tue Feb 05, 2019 3:50 am

https://i.imgur.com/6mVkABy.jpg

Witness · Post by **Witness** » Sat Feb 09, 2019 2:14 am

https://i.imgur.com/mi9DBv0.jpg

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Fri Feb 15, 2019 6:44 pm

Satanic Temple files discrimination complaint vs. Boston City Council

A Salem-based satanist [Sic--Ed.] group that claims it was denied a chance to say the invocation at a City Council meeting has filed a complaint with the Massachusetts Commission Against Discrimination.

The City Council traditionally opens meetings with an invocation, typically a prayer by a clergy member. But when the Satanic Temple asked to deliver the invocation at any available date, it alleges, the council denied the request, saying that invocation speakers are scheduled by invitation, and council members can choose whomever they see fit.

“The idea of an invitation-only policy being non-discriminatory is nonsensical,” said Lucien Greaves, a temple spokesman. “It’s the very definition of discrimination.”

The commission and City Council President Andrea Campbell did not return calls Thursday.

Councilor-at-Large Annissa Essaibi George said through a spokeswoman that she never told temple members they weren’t allowed to give the invocation at a meeting.

“She just invites clergy based on a personal relationship she has with them or if they’re directly related to work that she does,” Greaves said. “She’s never specifically prevented someone from giving the invocation.”

The temple argues that while the practice of opening public meetings with prayers or invocations was deemed legal by the Supreme Court in 2014, the ruling made clear that municipalities are not free to engage in viewpoint discrimination in determining which religions may offer prayers or invocations, nor are they free to preference faith over non-belief.

Boston Sun

--J.D.

Witness · Post by **Witness** » Sat Feb 16, 2019 2:46 am

https://i.imgur.com/JEHEv9w.jpg

Witness · Post by **Witness** » Sun Feb 17, 2019 12:01 am

Slightly

NSFW:

Witness · Post by **Witness** » Wed Feb 27, 2019 1:37 am

South Africa funeral firm to sue pastor for 'resurrection stunt'

https://i.imgur.com/qNDuIIJ.jpg

A group of funeral directors in South Africa say they will sue a self-styled prophet who claims to have resurrected a dead man.

A viral video of Pastor Alph Lukau shows him shouting "rise up" to a man lying down in a coffin who then jerks upright to cheers from worshippers.

The funeral companies say they were manipulated into being involved.

The spectacle, seen outside Pastor Lukau's church near Johannesburg, has been ridiculed and condemned by many.

"There are no such things as miracles," the Commission for the Promotion and Protection of Cultural, Religious and Linguistic Communities (CRL Rights Commission) told South Africa's national broadcaster.

"They are made up to try to get money from the hopelessness of our people."

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-africa-47370398

Witness · Post by **Witness** » Fri Mar 01, 2019 1:55 am

https://i.imgur.com/vgR1ffp.jpg