Official 2022 World Cup Thread

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Hotarubi
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Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Hotarubi »

Hotarubi
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Hotarubi »

Yes!

It's the Quadr....Quadra....Quadricalannual footysoccball event where you have to compete against teams from somewhere else on the planet in order to call yourselves "world champions". I know that some people struggle with that bizarre concept.

This quadricoighhg the tournament is being held in a country named after what you find up your nose. A country that bribed it's way to the top of the pile to get the gig and a country with such a lousy humans rights record, that only, only the largest of checks can tempt Northern Popstars ,who have spoken out against LBGHTBGT+ issues in the past when it might have sold a few records, to perform during the tournament.

Now, who is taking part. Countries! Countries, that there Americans. Different places. Other green bits on that there map. Hope that helps.

Lets have a look at the tables:

Group A

1. Ecuador
2. Senegal
3. Netherlands
4. Qatar

Group C

1. Saudi Arabia
2. Poland
3. Mexico
4. Argentina

Group D

1. Australia
2. Tunisia
3. Denmark
4. France

Group E

1. Costa Rica
2. Japan
3. Germany
4. Spain

Group F

1. Canada
2. Morocco
3. Croatia
4. Belgium

Group G

1. Cameroon
2. Serbia
3. Switzerland
4. Brazil

Group H

1. Ghana
2. South Korea
3. Uruguay
4. Portugal

It used to be fashionable in every world cup to have a "Group of Death" where any 2 of the group had the prowess to progress. Recently this tradition has faded as now Pretty much two crap teams and two good ones end up in each group. There's a reason for this and it's technically called "a fiddle."

Astute people amongst you who have knowledge of the alphabet and to assist the MAGA types (crayons available) will notice that group B is missing. Why?

Because it deserves it's own post. THAT'S why. Losers.
`
Hotarubi
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Hotarubi »

And here it is, group B. The "group of dearth" A.K.A. THE GROUP OF ULTIMATE GALACTIC DENSITY!!!

England!
OOSA!
Iran!
F...Wales!

You cannot, cannot even hand pick a group of such political magnitude. It is also the group that is devoid of the most talent. Details:

1. Ingeeeerrlllaaannndddd. Outright winners in 1815 and shared the tournament victory in 1918 and 1945 when some substitues came on and didn't louse things up. Managed by Sir Southgate of Gareth who currently holds the title of tournament's most tedious human. Which is some effort considerign the Belgium squad qualified. Lost to the sporting powerhouse of Hungary recently, twice, and have Harry McGuire in the team. I think we know where this is going and high street takeaways of the nation that knocks us out should re-enforce their windows.

2. United States of Getreadyforthetotallytotallyguaranteedredwaveohnoestearsoffail. Generally turn up in the second half when games have already been won and claim they won it. (see above). Tournament history of naive heroic failure. Basically the Atlanta of world scoccer. Coached by a Nazi who took over from Tina Arena.

3. A nation of Backward thinking, uneducated, cave dwelling sub-human terrorists who dress in rags and oppress women.

4. Iran.


In fact, completely ignore this group. It's shit.

My tip for the tournament will be relayed to you about 16 minutes after the final has finished.

Realz.
`
Doctor X
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Doctor X »

Sorry, I thought this was the "Sports" section.

– J.D.
Hotarubi
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Hotarubi »

Denver Broncos.

I win.
DJ
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by DJ »

Not if you pick the Broncos.
Hotarubi
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Hotarubi »

My comedy works on many levels.
Anaxagoras
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Anaxagoras »

Japan is in a tough group. I guess they are probably not favored to make it out of the group stage. But they could conceivably score an upset, if everything goes perfectly for them. Although they recently lost to Canada in a friendly, which probably doesn't bode well for beating the likes of Spain and Germany.
ed
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by ed »

https://thumbs.dreamstime.com/z/sleepin ... 365406.jpg
But they could conceivably score an upset
https://thumbs.dreamstime.com/z/sleepin ... 365406.jpg
Ben Trovado
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Ben Trovado »

This is actually a real thing?

I always assumed it was something like Calvinball.
Doctor X
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Doctor X »

Except Calvinball is a sport.

And is fun.

– J.D.
Hotarubi
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Hotarubi »

First game and what everyone expected to happen, happened.

Ecuador 2 - Qatar 0.

Ecuador had a free kick close to the Qatar goal area late in the second and the Qatarians took the unprecedent step of putting six migrant workers in the wall, along with nine in the underpass and three in the children's playground outside the stadium..
Hotarubi
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Hotarubi »

Today:

Senegal v Clogs
1966 World Champions v Muslims
OOSA v No, you're not a REAL country.*

* - I suggest all you that there Americans who watched the Jets v Cheaters last night watch this for a significant upgrade in sporting entertainment. Of some magnitude I might add.
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Hotarubi »

Started already:
The opening game of the 2022 Qatar World Cup is set to take place under a cloud of controversy after allegations of match-fixing emerged.
The host nation, Qatar, will start the tournament against Ecuador at 3am (AEDT) at Al Bayt Stadium, following the opening ceremony.
Watch the world’s best footballers every week with beIN SPORTS on Kayo. LIVE coverage from Bundesliga, Ligue 1, Serie A, Carabao Cup, EFL & SPFL. New to Kayo? Start your free trial now >
Qatar is ranked 50th in the world, and pundits do not expect it to challenge for the top two positions in Group A, with the Netherlands heavily favoured to win the group and Ecuador and Senegal fighting for second place.
The lead-up to the tournament has been marred by various controversies, particularly the country’s treatment of migrant workers and intolerance towards homosexuality.
In this latest potential scandal, author and political affairs expert Amjad Taha alleges Qatar has bribed multiple Ecuadorian players to lose the opening match on purpose, using a total sum of $US7.4 million ($11.1 million).
Taha claims to have confirmed the scheme’s existence with “insiders” in both camps, and says it would involve a 1-0 scoreline, with the goal coming in the second half.
Ecuador won 2-0. Both goals scored in the first half.
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Hotarubi »

https://www.news.com.au/sport/football/ ... 52f6fabcf2
One of the world’s biggest beer brands has responded after Qatar banned the sale of all alcoholic drinks in World Cup stadiums – just days before the tournament begins.
The Muslim nation had promised organisers FIFA it would relax its strict laws to allow fans to drink beer at matches and inside fan zones.
But, despite Budweiser – owned by Belgian beer giant Anheuser-Busch InBev (AB InBev) – having a massive $112 million sponsorship deal with FIFA, Qatar has now decided to renege on its vow.
Alcohol is still expected to be sold in corporate zones, which wealthy fans can pay thousands of dollars to enter.
...after fans have bought tickets, booked hotels, flights etc.

:De_Bunk:
Ben Trovado
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Ben Trovado »

Doctor X wrote: Mon Nov 21, 2022 6:44 am Except Calvinball is a sport.

And is fun.

– J.D.
Quidditch, then?
Ben Trovado
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Ben Trovado »

Hotarubi wrote: Mon Nov 21, 2022 9:25 am Today:

Senegal v Clogs
1966 World Champions v Muslims
OOSA v No, you're not a REAL country.*

* - I suggest all you that there Americans who watched the Jets v Cheaters last night watch this for a significant upgrade in sporting entertainment. Of some magnitude I might add.
So, as near as I can tell, this is sorta like hockey, only with the fun parts removed, played by people who fall over in great - but short-lived - agony from the nearest gust of wind, and it's really, really, really, really, really, really slow. I mean, add a few really's there.

And they aren't allowing beer to get through a full match? Jesus. Someone contact The Hague.
Hotarubi
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Hotarubi »

Ben Trovado wrote: Mon Nov 21, 2022 2:14 pm played by people who fall over in great - but short-lived - agony from the nearest gust of wind,
No, it's not the NBA.
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Hotarubi »

Saying that, the Welsh are taking "falling over and screaming due to heavy atmosphere impact" to South American levels.

OOSA 1 - Diggers 0 43 mins
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Hotarubi »

OOSA 1 - Diggers 1

Final.
Doctor X
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Doctor X »

A Real Sport does not end in a tie.

– J.D.
Ben Trovado
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Ben Trovado »

Sudden Death. With a dozen machetes placed at center court.

It would up viewing by 3000%.

It still wouldn't match hockey, but at least it would be an effort.
Hotarubi
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Hotarubi »

Doctor X wrote: Mon Nov 21, 2022 11:46 pm A Real Sport does not end in a tie.

– J.D.
It's not a tie. It is 50% of a win.















































Actually, points wise it's 33%.
Last edited by Hotarubi on Tue Nov 22, 2022 9:17 am, edited 1 time in total.
Hotarubi
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Hotarubi »

England, inventor of the beautiful game 6 - Iran 2

They actually had some Iranian women in the stadium. And you could see their faces!!

AND THEY WEREN''T BRUISED!!!|||

What's going on!!!??? Fox news and the Daily Mail didn't tell us this.
ed
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by ed »

Hotarubi wrote: Mon Nov 21, 2022 9:20 am First game and what everyone expected to happen, happened.

Ecuador 2 - Qatar 0.

Ecuador had a free kick close to the Qatar goal area late in the second and the Qatarians took the unprecedent step of putting six migrant workers in the wall, along with nine in the underpass and three in the children's playground outside the stadium..
Really????

https://media.istockphoto.com/id/184115 ... yrokmqdkY=
Do you think it can get more exciting?

Ecuador AND Qatar. Wow.
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Hotarubi »

Yes Ed. They are places that exist "somewhere else."
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Doctor X »

I am sorry, were you writing something?

Nodded off there.

– J.D.
Hotarubi
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Hotarubi »

Doctor X wrote: Tue Nov 22, 2022 11:56 pm I am sorry, were you writing something?

Nodded off there.

– J.D.
Thread's not about the NBA. Hth.

Friday! OOSA V Inventors of Industrial revolution. Epic!
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Anaxagoras »

Japan managed to beat Germany somehow 2-1.

I'd say this gives them a good chance to make it out of the group stage now.

https://www.fifa.com/fifaplus/en/watch/ ... dVQTpd3br7
ed
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by ed »

https://thumbs.dreamstime.com/b/silhoue ... 401624.jpg

Wow, just wow. How did those dinky little guys win against the aryan hoards?
Anaxagoras
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Anaxagoras »

Frankly they got lucky. Germany should have won, but didn't. They dominated in things like shots, shots on target and time of possession, but ultimately those don't count for anything. Japan had two lucky shots and Germany only one.
ed
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by ed »

Payoff?

Devious Oriental's?

Do tell.
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Hotarubi »

I know. I was watching and loving it. Nazis have to beat Spain or they're out.

Also Saudi Arabia beat Argentina. Phbhbhbhhbhppbphbhbhpppt! Although it would not surprise me if there was some "under the table" tactics involving envelopes of a tawny shade going on there.

I'm not going to mention Denmark Jets V Tunisia Patriots.....or Poland Patriots V Mexico Jets. Jesus christ!
ed
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by ed »

God, it really is exciting.
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Hotarubi »

I think Ed finally understands the mechanics of the governing bodies of world soccer.
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Hotarubi »

https://twitter.com/JoePompliano/status ... HrbY95YnjA
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Hotarubi »

ed wrote: Wed Nov 23, 2022 5:19 pm God, it really is exciting.
Gun threads.

Thanks.
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Pyrrho »

Hotarubi wrote: Mon Nov 21, 2022 10:39 am https://www.news.com.au/sport/football/ ... 52f6fabcf2
One of the world’s biggest beer brands has responded after Qatar banned the sale of all alcoholic drinks in World Cup stadiums – just days before the tournament begins.
The Muslim nation had promised organisers FIFA it would relax its strict laws to allow fans to drink beer at matches and inside fan zones.
But, despite Budweiser – owned by Belgian beer giant Anheuser-Busch InBev (AB InBev) – having a massive $112 million sponsorship deal with FIFA, Qatar has now decided to renege on its vow.
Alcohol is still expected to be sold in corporate zones, which wealthy fans can pay thousands of dollars to enter.
...after fans have bought tickets, booked hotels, flights etc.

:De_Bunk:
Yeah, but is Budweiser really beer?
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Hotarubi »

Your average soccer fan does not have the same cultured palate as those with good breeding - such as ourselves.

Coors. That's the spirit.
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Re: Official 2022 World Cup Thread

Post by Pyrrho »

Back in the day, Dad drank Schlitz.

Anyway:
https://i.imgur.com/zfjkEFX.jpg